Write You Away

December 18th, 2010

No other words to describe it
I still wonder in guilt
I call this confusion
Locked in the walls I built
They’re not coming down
I live life in shame
And the more I start to wonder
The more I feel insane
Nothing’s alright
Nothing’s okay
Why are you still on my mind
Why won’t you go away
I write you off
The words drop from my pen
But after sometime
You’re back once again

It Doesn’t Matter

December 13th, 2010

It doesn’t matter
How many people are around
I feel so empty
Drowned in the sound
I feel so distant
So far away
And no matter how close
I’m too far to stay
It doesn’t matter though
These people aren’t real
And even if they were
They don’t care how I feel
They don’t know how to love
They don’t know how to see
And in this lonely dark world
I’m still nobody
It doesn’t matter
It’s always been this way
The people don’t care
They don’t want to stay
Nobody cares
But I grew up this way
With no one around
There’s no need to run away
The mirror is my company
The mirror is so fake
The mirror is not my friend
The mirror deserves to break
I like contusions
I know that they’re real
I can see the pain
It’s something that can heal
I don’t like attachment
I don’t like to know
If they get too close
I have to let go
It doesn’t matter though
I grew up this way
Always alone
I don’t know how to stay
It doesn’t matter though
Everyone is fake
All alone
The mirror watches me break

Departing

January 30th, 2022

Secrets pile up
Like bottles in the trash
Gaslighting my suspicion
And it hits me like whiplash
Years have gone by
It hasn’t gotten better
But things will never change
After a decade has weathered
Invading my privacy
Because you wanted the truth
Instead of speaking like adults
You chose to sleuth
Complicated is an understatement
You violated my trust
I just want to take off
And hide in my wanderlust