The Ending

December 11th, 2019

Time has passed
But I still ache
I told my truth
You let me break
Locked in my journal
The events that I transcribed
The feelings that I held
The medicine they prescribed
What happened can’t be changed
As I watched you drive away
We can’t alter the past
But we can start over today
Because in the midnight hours
When I was most vulnerable
You made a mistake
And we were irrecoverable
Because I am not an instrument
I’m not here to be played
I trusted too easily
Which left me betrayed
So if we see each other
There’s nothing to discuss
You made your decision
And left me with mistrust
All these songs know how I feel
And I can’t keep pretending
I’m worth more than an afterthought
So this must be the ending

Diagram

May 3rd, 2019

They say that you should follow your dreams
But that’s not as simple as it seems
When all my thoughts still echo of blame
It’s time to leave who I became
Anxiety is not who I am
I’m more than just your diagram
I have goals that I will pursue
This feeling is something I need to subdue
Me and depression are not one and the same
I’m my own identity with my own name
These pills I take to make me feel better
Because living without them is too hard to weather
And I don’t know who I should be
I can’t bear to know this side of me
So I must find how to proceed
A path that leads me to succeed

Porcelain

January 7th, 2019

I grew up in a Dollhouse
That I left behind
I’m too old to play games
And there is no rewind
I can’t go home
Because all of it was fake
And just because I’m not porcelain
Doesn’t mean that I don’t break
They can’t fix me in a workshop
Because I’m no longer a Doll
And no matter what they tell me
One pill can’t cure it all

Snapchat-1865004670.jpg