I’m Not Yours

July 23rd, 2009

You make me hear the colors
Make me feel the sounds
Make my heart beat faster
Make me scream out loud

There’s something in this feeling
Something I can’t hide
Something in you
Something’s getting to me now

[Pre-Chorus:]
And I don’t know
How much longer
I
Can
Take it

[Chorus:]
You’re here, then you’re not
I move on, you pull back
Up and down, left and right
I’m looking all around
I want you, to want me
And I know, that you know
But the only time I matter
Is when – I’m not yours

There’s something so relaxing
Something makes me feel alive
And as attention’s missing
I go off on my own

There’s something about the pain
Something about what you are
Something about the situation
I’m on the edge of defeat

[Pre-Chorus:]
And I don’t know
How much longer
I
Can
Take it

[Chorus:]
You’re here, then you’re not
I move on, you pull back
Up and down, left and right
I’m looking all around
I want you, to want me
And I know, that you know
But the only time I matter
Is when – I’m not yours

And here we go again
I’m being pushed away
I can’t take this game
Just stop playing me

[Pre-Chorus:]
And I don’t know
How much longer
I
Can
Take it

[Chorus:]
You’re here, then you’re not
I move on, you pull back
Up and down, left and right
I’m looking all around
I want you, to want me
And I know, that you know
But the only time I matter
Is when – I’m not yours

So, I’m not yours…

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Fiction

July 1st, 2019

The words don’t leave my pencil
You must be satisfied
Because I bottled up my feelings
And I buried them alive
I don’t want any pity
There must be some confusion
I am more than my own story
And your fictitious disillusion
You pretend that you know me
When all you know is your perception
So I gave myself a new identity
And stepped away from your rejection
But you send me right back to that place
Like I’m a scared little kid
Because you still hold that power
When you refuse to admit what you did
So you can write your own narrative
And you can convince yourself it’s true
But no matter how you conclude this
I will never forgive you

Reflected

September 27th, 2005

I want to wake up and know everything’s okay
Instead — I just slip away
Into the blackness of my heart
The closer the light, the farther apart
In the corner of my eyes I can see
The moving of my life as it’s dragging along me
In the mirror is my reflection
And in its heart is your rejection
All of my pain is reflected from me
None of it they can see
It’s all about my shattered heart
Thousands of pieces all fallen apart

 

2005 (9)