Reflections Don’t Lie

May 31st, 2021

I feel beside myself
Am I even here
My life turned into
Something insincere
Is this the wakeup call
That I have been needing
These wounds never healed
I can still feel them bleeding
Taking bits and pieces
I try to keep things together
Nothing ever fits
When I’m a victim of the weather
I’ve crashed and I’ve burned
For something I yearn
A content life
But it’s just not my turn
Is it too much medication
Or is it not enough
When I spill out all my feelings
I regret opening up
Then I realize
That it’s not only me
Like Cassie Steele asked
“How much for happy?”

Fears

March 24th, 2010

It scares me
The thought that once again I’m fooled
Because I am so naive
And vulnerable
Should I trust again
The question doesn’t leave my mind
I’m feeling so lost
I’m feeling less sain
My heart has a way
Of getting the best of me
Does this deserve the best?
Do I even have a best?
These chemicals are overwhelming
I can’t keep a thought
I can’t fight my feelings
I need this to stop
I don’t know what’s right
I’m scared of the past
I try to keep hope
But I just can’t forget
Haunting my thoughts
And I can’t let it go
These feelings are confusing me
More than you know
Should I give in
Should I take a chance
My heart is so restless
Beating out of my chest

Dethroned

April 24th, 2021

Are you listening to me
I see you disassociate from our conversation
Engaged with another
Like they’re your salvation
Are you seeing me
You make me feel lamentable
Like I’m too much or not enough
Because you’ve deemed me as dispensable
Do you hear your contradictions
Holding me to higher standards than you alone
Inconsistent with your actions
Get off your self-appointed throne